The Journal #40
Shadow. Wearable. Last. Earlier.
The Shadow - Parts of ourselves we prefer to hide or deny
01. PSYCHOLOGY - Joe Gaunt
Carl Jung (Part 2 of 3) – The Shad0w - Facing fears and embracing a sense of the whole self
One of Jung’s most profound and often daunting concepts is that of ‘the Shadow’, this being the parts of ourselves that we prefer to hide or deny.
Do you have behaviours you are not proud of? Traits in how you naturally think but don’t particularly feel comfortable with? Moments you did something and wish to forget?
‘The Shadow’ consists of traits and impulses that we often find uncomfortable or unacceptable, and as a result, they are relegated to the unconscious. A way of coping with some of these hard truths by kind of ignoring or not acknowledging them in ourselves.
However, Jung argued that acknowledging and integrating our shadow is key to personal growth and self-awareness.
Facing your shadow involves a willingness to confront your fears, insecurities, and less flattering qualities. Not easy but something I have found comes easier for most with age and experience (and perhaps most importantly, a willingness and desire to grow, evolve or change).
For example, if someone is overly proud of their kindness, they may suppress their capacity for anger. Yet, anger can be a valid emotion, necessary in setting boundaries and as a key defense mechanism to life's wrongs. The goal of shadow work isn’t to become perfect, but to become whole by embracing every part of ourselves. A sense of balance and acceptance of what is needed as a whole ‘self’.
Alongside the shadow, Jung emphasised the concept of the ‘Self’. The self is the overarching unity of our conscious and unconscious minds. The self represents a state of balance and wholeness, where we no longer live in fragments of our personality but strive towards a harmonious integration of all parts of our being.
This process of psychological integration is known as individuation—the journey towards becoming your true, authentic self. Powerful stuff!
Quick tips for facing your shadow:
1. Self-reflection: Journaling or meditative reflection on your reactions and emotions can help bring hidden aspects of your personality to light.
2. Observe projections: Notice when you react strongly to others. Often, what irritates us in others is a trait we’ve disowned in ourselves.
3. Seek support: Deep self, discovery work can be intense/ challenging, so working with a therapist or support group can provide a safe environment for exploration.
Next week we move on to personality archetypes and understanding some of our resulting behavioural patterns.
Wearable Tech - Healthy or Hindrance?
02. HEALTH
Wearables
I’ve been wearing Whoop for the last 3 years. It has become a key part of me understanding better what is going on inside my body. But is it good for us?
In the first year or so of wearing Whoop my wife said, on more than one occasion, that she felt the data I received was making me more stressed. She might have had a point.
But, am I the only one who loves taking a peek under the hood (not that hood)? And why are more and more men in particular keen to understand more about their health and fitness?
Wearable technology in the UK has seen notable uptake among men, particularly those aged 35 and over, with specific demographic trends highlighting usage patterns and benefits. As of 2023, men represented approximately 55% of wearable users in the UK. Among men aged 35 and over, wearable adoption has been largely driven by health concerns, with studies showing that nearly 25% of men in this age group use fitness trackers or smartwatches to monitor heart health, activity levels, and sleep quality. This has surely got to be a positive thing for our future selves?
Men are particularly interested in heart rate monitoring and sleep tracking, as heart health becomes a more prominent concern with age. Research from the British Heart Foundation shows that men over 35 who use wearables report a higher awareness of their cardiovascular health, with 15% stating that the device has prompted them to make lifestyle changes, such as increasing physical activity or improving diet. Again, a good thing.
Additionally, wearables have proven useful for maintaining daily activity goals; studies indicate that men aged 35 and over who use wearables are, on average, 35% more likely to meet recommended activity levels, such as 150 minutes of moderate exercise per week.
However, and here comes the rub, privacy concerns are particularly high among older male users, with 70% of men over 35 expressing concerns about data security, according to a survey by the Information Commissioner’s Office.
Furthermore, and this is the camp I fell into, wearables may exacerbate stress as some users feel added pressure to reach set targets, which can result in decreased motivation if expectations are not met. I use Whoop primarily to track and monitor my sleep with the purpose of ensuring I understand the things that reduce or harm my ability to recover optimally. Things that reduce the quality of my sleep include: Ice baths or caffeine in the afternoon, alcohol, Jiu Jitsu in the evening, sharing a bed with my wife (but that will not change) and a few others. I also now understand better the things that promote better recovery.
Overall, while wearable technology offers promising health insights for men, especially those aged 35 and older, it’s essential to approach these devices as supplementary health tools, balancing potential data inaccuracies and privacy risks with the benefits of improved self-awareness and health accountability.
The key I believe is to know the reason y0u want to understand the data in the first place and not just to have the data in your life for the sake of it.
Oh last thing. The one thing my Whoop can’t tell me but is right 100% of the time is…yes you guessed it…asking myself how I actually feel!
Try that first and then invest in the tech.
Our dog Ziggy
03. MINDSET - Mike Bates
Last
This week I’ve been Home Alone - digression right off the bat - Home Alone is my favourite Christmas movie and Christmas is only 55 days away!!! Ho Ho Ho.
Sorry, the very thought of mince pies does that to me.
Let’s start this again…
This week I’ve been home alone.
My wife and two sons have been enjoying a week away with my mother-in-law in Tenerife whilst I’ve been back here holding the fort.
Having regular quality time away with her mum and our boys is something I always encourage my wife to do. She needs little persuading.
When I find myself home alone I treat it a bit like a training camp. It’s not often I get to be selfish and so this is how I choose to spend my time each and every day.
Walk. Train. Work. Eat well. See friends. Recover. Read. Sleep well. Repeat.
It’s a boring and routine led existence but I love it.
When the majority of one’s life is spent in the service of others (coaching, mentoring, leading, parenting etc) it’s a nice change to spend a bit more time on me.
Here’s the interesting thing I noticed this week.
Day to day I still put myself last. And I’m pretty certain it’ll be the same for most of you.
Take my morning routine for instance:
Wake up. Make the bed. Ablutions. Open all blinds and curtains. Clean out the cat litter tray. Let the dog out. Feed the cats. Put the washing in. Let the dog in. Pick up dog mess. Feed the dog. Wash up the pots. Get myself a glass of water. Wipe down kitchen surfaces. Make and eat breakfast. Head to training and/or work.
10 tasks for others before I even drink a glass of water (11-15 if the kids are home).
Those 10 tasks usually take me or my wife around 30 minutes.
So the first 30 minutes of my day every day, during a purposefully selfish week, is not very selfish at all.
Interesting.
And then I thought about the chipped tooth I’ve put off getting fixed for 18 months and the toenail that got ripped off in training that I need fixing, again something I’ve been talking about doing for over a year but have yet to get around to.
The dog had a slight limp recently and he was in and out of the vets in under 24 hours.
Why is it we choose to feed and care for our pets and our family with more intention and urgency than we do for ourselves?
We accept (grudgingly perhaps) a veterinary bill into the £££ yet won’t invest in a decent daily multi-vitamin and probiotic or regular gym membership for us.
The dog eats flash-frozen red deer steaks whilst we search for the reductions in the isles of the local supermarket.
Our children do more activities, enjoy newer clothes and see their friends way more than we do.
All this caring and putting others first is good and I’m not writing this to encourage you to do anything other than give what you can to the people (and pets) you love.
But, what I am encouraging is that you perhap put yourself a little higher on the list from time to time.
Go get that back pain looked at. Invest in a coach that will hold you accountable and help you to stay healthy. Eat steak once a week. Treat yourself to a massage or that nice shirt you like.
There’s a reason we’re instructed to ‘put your oxygen mask on before helping others’ every time we fly.
We can’t pour from an empty cup and unless we’re happy, healthy and feeling good about ourselves and our lives we simply can’t give as much as we would like to others.
Being selfish every now and then should be seen as a positive and unselfish action.
Caring the most for others requires that you are in the best shape to do so.
Fill up your cup regularly.
Don’t always put yourself last.
Disclaimer: - In a normal week my wife does the lion’s share of tasks at home. She also read this article and reminded me that I spent 3 months alone in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean 2 years ago and that she had to do all of this stuff whilst I was away. (I strongly maintain my argument that the charity row was an unselfish act not a mid-Atlantic all-inclusive cruise). My response? - ‘You’re right love. Always’ (whispered through gritted chipped teeth).
04. QUOTE
“If you want to have enough to give to others, you will need to take care of yourself first. A tree that refuses water and sunlight for itself, can’t bear fruits for others” – Emily Maroutian
08. TIP
Making self-care a priority isn’t easy. It needs to become a habit.
Here’s a simple tip to ensure you ensure that you put your own oxygen mask on first every day -
Set you alarm for 30 minutes earlier than you currently do.
Get up before your family and use that half an hour to do something just for you.
A daily journal. A stretch. A quiet cup of tea. A short walk.
Your time. Your choice.
Then, and only then, give everything you have for everyone else.
The Founder’s Welcome - Joe & Mike opening The Hundred 2024 at The Castle
Early Bird Tickets for The Hundred 2025 went live on 1st November via a private link.
5 tickets only for each accommodation category.
Each has 20% off.
When they’re gone they’re gone.
We have only 1 Early Bird Camper van ticket remaining and 2 VIP.
Missed it? FOMO? Send us a message here and we will reply with the link
We believe that when men live happier, healthier & more fulfilled lives…everyone wins! - NXT45
The Journal by NXT45
